CRAP! JUST CRAP!

Good gracious me. I told myself, time and again.

SUSU, don't start liking that bastard Mistral, AGAIN. HE WILL HURT YOU.

Looks like my conscience is correct, every time when I face a problem. I'm really a stupid old fart. I really detest myself. It's like the answer is up in my head. It's just ME deciding NOT to follow what my head says. I seriously have it all up there. Just me and my stupidity blinded me. Time and again, I've ignored what my head says. I really hate myself! It doesn't help that the bastard tries to cloud me.

I'll be honest with myself. Ever since he told me about the triangle between him and RedRue and Amythyst, I had a feeling it was a problem caused solely by him. He's a playboy and that will stay a fact. I'm getting pissed off at myself now. I'm not pissed at him, amazingly. He's the cause for me being a confused idiot. A fucked-up confused idiot.

Let's see.

Amythyst told me about herself. She trusted MistralCharm so much, she entrusted him with her character passwords. She lost 60 million and a Snow Jester. According to Amy, her Snow Jester was given to RedRue by MistralCharm himself.

FUN-NEE.

I wonder if it was a true story or not.

Ok, more.

Amythyst told me that Mistral phoned her and told her he LOVES her. He talked about me not wanting to play Dark Ages anymore. I just said I do not wish to register until Redemption. I didn't say I wouldn't wish to log in till Redemption. So, all the excuses about me not wanting to play makes him scuttle to Amythyst? He could just be fucking frank with me. He doesn't have to go through all the trouble. Honestly, for all I care, he can remain in his own damned problems between Amythyst and RedRue. He doesn't have to include ME. Afterall, I want nothing to with Mistral A-N-Y-M-O-R-E. He can go figure the matters for himself. So sick of cock and bull stories.

WELL! Honestly, when I was with him, I WAS already uncomfortable. Which is honestly why I broke up with him. The second time I was with him, it was mostly out of pity. But as days go by, I feel more and more like a friend. Just a friend, no more than that.

Oh well, enough crapping. Night night.

Labels: iwannacalmmyselfdown