Hihi Claisavard~
Kepalaku bingung memikirkannya. Hatiku berdegup cepat melihatnya. Hatiku sakit ketika bersamanya.
Wanna know why?
So much about him that leaves me utterly speechless.
Why do I like him?
Why do I envy him?
Why do I wanna be with him?
Why did I
EVEN chose him?
Why is there such a chaos in my heart, thinking of him?
Why the butterflies?
Why do I
NEED him by my side?
Ultimately...
Why do I love him?
But why the pain when I'm with him? The knowledge... The lingering intuition that one day he'll be free from my grasp. I don't know. I'm just so... You know the song 'NSync? Tearin' Up My Heart? It feels like that. JUST on the dot, like that. I need metal songs to save my sanity.
LEFTOVER sanity. NOW. That I've open those songs. Phantom of The Opera is my current listening. I just needed that to calm me down. It's my resort.
Oh well. I don't know. I think communication breakdown, obviously. Hahaha. So much confusion. Screw languages of heart. Tired to think and figure out puzzles so unbelievably hard to solve. It's like saying 10,000 puzzle pieces unperfect because the main picture is gone.
Oh I don't know! HELL! I HATE CONFUSIONS! PERIOD! Now stop haunting my life and go bug someone else! Stupid voices. GAH! With regards to Mars blog, I feel the same pain. But for her, it's worse. She's loyal and devoted. To one person till today. It's like a drama, I daresay!~ But she isn't in a relationship before. Sigh! I don't know lha! Tired of thinking, personally speaking.
Hardcore truth: Love either eventually sucks or is a dream come true.